21
Dec
09

The Leek Shall Inherit the Earth – Part 2

I apologize for missing last week’s update.  Because this story continues directly from a joke at the end of the last post, I do suggest checking out Part 1 for a quick refresher before continuing on with Part 2

I have a huge favor to ask from any readers out there.  The numbers on this blog have been extremely low, as have the sales on The Apocalypse Shift novel.  I love this universe and all the characters in it, but I also do need any and all writing income for various plans I have in the near future.  Although I dearly want to continue writing in this universe, my time often has to instead be spent writing things that can pay the bills.  If you the reader want to continue seeing Apocalypse Shift stories and novels with any regularity, I desperately need the numbers to improve.  Please, if you are enjoying these stories, consider purchasing a copy of the novel.  If you are a fan of the novel or blog, then please spread the word to others.  I know I’m not the only one who would like to see the Apocalypse Shift universe continue.

Okay, begging over.  Thank you for being patient.  I hope you enjoy this week’s installment.

Derek J. Goodman

The Leek Shall Inherit the Earth – Part 2

            “So you’re telling me she’s turning into something freakish?”

            “Seems like it.”

            “I need to just stop talking altogether,” Caleb said.

            “I do believe I was saying that since before I quit here,” Gloria said.

            It was technically time for Caleb to punch in by now, but he instead stood in the back room and paced.  Gloria watched him, occasionally looking out the door into the store.  Phil was at his register helping a customer.  He didn’t look happy that Caleb wasn’t doing his job yet, but he would just have to deal with it at the moment.  Kelly was gone by now, but Sheila was still in the store.  She and Courtney stood over by the magazine racks and talked quietly.  Caleb guessed they were hammering out the details of Courtney moving in, but if Gloria’s warning was any indication, Sheila would very shortly not want anything to do with her.

            “So you saw this in the changing room at the department store?” Caleb asked.

            “Yep,” Gloria said.  “She was trying on some clothes and I knocked on the door to give her a few more things to try on.  She’d forgotten to latch the door, and for a brief moment the door was open enough that I could see inside.”

            “And you saw leaves in her pubic hair?”

            “Sort of.  They were poking out from the underwear she’d put on.”

            “I’m not sure whether I find that image repulsive or sexy.”

            “You’re lucky you’re pacing.  If you were closer to me I’d smack you.”

            “And what did she say when you asked her about them?” Caleb asked.

            “I didn’t,” Gloria said.  “She just quietly pulled up her pants and asked about the clothes I’d brought her.  She wasn’t trying to hide them at all.  Which probably means… I don’t know.  Maybe she didn’t even realize they were there?”

            “Maybe.  They sure weren’t there when I wrapped her in toilet paper.  They probably just grew very recently.  But she would have had to notice that she’d suddenly grown…”

            “If you ever want to sleep with me again,” Gloria said, “then you’d better not be about to make a joke about a bush.”

            Caleb frowned.  “You know, considering what you do, you can sometimes be a bit of a prude.”

            “Get your mind out of the gods-damned gutter already and face what’s happening.  That poor girl is turning into one of her vegetable people.”

            Caleb sighed.  “Sorry.  You’re right.  So she’s changing now, but she wasn’t changing earlier.  Think we can assume that everything she said earlier about how this change works was true?”

            “Don’t really have any choice.  She could have been lying, I guess.  But if she hadn’t changed yet and she was telling the truth, then something doesn’t add up.”

            “What’s that?”

            “Well, she said that right about the time the leaves start to appear, the person’s mind is completely gone.  Yet she certainly doesn’t seem mindless.  A little scared, maybe, a little overwhelmed.  But completely in control of herself.”

            Caleb leaned up against a shelf full of extra toilet paper and stood for several seconds with his head bowed, thinking.  “Well,” he said, “I can think of two possibilities.  One is that her mind really is gone and she’s being controlled, and we just don’t know enough about her to see the difference.”

            “You think the vegetables from her reality can control her all the way here?”

            “Probably not.  Only if they came over to this side maybe?  Which would mean that some of her killer broccoli came over with her.”

            “But we haven’t seen any sign of that yet,” Gloria said.

            “Right, which might mean…”

            “Maybe that just because she’s infected she hasn’t actually had her mind disappear, because no veggie is pushing it aside.”

            “I don’t know,” Caleb said.  “Maybe something like that.  Can’t really say I’m too terribly familiar with vegetable mind-control techniques.  It sounds like as good a hypothesis as any.”

            “Do you think she’s contagious?” Gloria asked.

            “I don’t know.  We can’t really risk it, I guess.  We should do something.”

            “Do what?  Lock her somewhere until she starts taking root?  Caleb, we can’t do anything that will put this poor girl through any more hell than she already has been.”

            “Well, I sure as hell don’t want her going through it either, but we got to…”

            Phil came through the door and between them.  “Guys, something seems to be wrong with your plant fighter.”

            All three of them ran through the door that came out behind the counter.  Other than them, Sheila, and Courtney, there were two other customers in the store at the moment.  Both of them looked human, but neither gave Courtney a second glance as they went about their business.  Anywhere else, that would have seemed cruel and heartless, considering Courtney looked like she was having some sort of seizure while Sheila held her up to keep her from falling over.  Maybe they just figured it was part of the weirdness of the Hill.  They would be right, but Caleb still thought that was cold.

            “I don’t know what the heck happened,” Sheila said.  She was too small to continue holding Courtney up for long, but Phil ran around the counter to help lower the trembling woman to the ground.  Caleb and Gloria followed, and as they got closer Caleb realized Courtney’s skin had taken on a greenish tint.  “One moment she was talking about where she could get some cheap furniture, and then all of a sudden poof!  Spastic city!”

            Gloria grabbed one of the thicker magazines off the rack and tried to put it in Courtney’s mouth as her jaw worked open and close, nearly shredding her tongue.  Caleb started to kneel down next to Courtney, but someone tapped his shoulder.  He turned around to see the two customers, one a lady in her forties and the other a guy in his mid-twenties, standing impatiently at the counter behind him.  The woman had a bottle of soda in hand, while the guy had nothing but an armful of beef jerky.

            “Excuse me, but could we get some damn service here?” the woman asked.

            “Ma’am, we’re kind of busy here.  Maybe if you could please call…”

            “I ain’t calling jack shit until you get your ass behind the counter where you belong so I can buy my lotto tickets for tonight.”  The guy behind her rolled his eyes and tapped his foot repeatedly.

            “Yeah, and I really got to get back to my meth lab,” the guy said.  “Something might boil over while I’m gone.”

            “Are you two really fucking serious?” Caleb asked.  “That kind of attitude would be cold even for me.”

            “Hurry up!” the woman said.  “If you don’t sell me my ticket in time I won’t be able to win and retire tomorrow!”

            “Okay, you know what?” the guy said.  “Screw this.”  Pushing past the woman, Caleb, and the small crowd gathered at the floor, he ran out the front door, trailing a few packages of beef jerky as he went.

            “Seriously?” Caleb screamed after him.  He bolted out the door, almost tripping over Courtney’s twitching leg.  He heard Gloria calling his name as he went out, probably wanting to warn him not to go after the guy, but he really didn’t have time to deal with the headache of reporting the theft of beef jerky while there was a woman turning into a plant nearby.

            He came to an abrupt halt at the edge of the front walk, and his mouth dropped open.  Every day at this job was the one where he thought he had finally seen everything, and every day he was wrong.

            A trail of beef jerky bags led out into the middle of the parking lot.  The guy that had stolen them was dead, or at least well on his way to death.  He’d fallen face first to the asphalt, and he was bleeding profusely from the numerous holes in his back.  Sticking out of each hole was a sharpened stick of celery.  Five feet away from him, an eggplant was somehow holding up a mop-head.  It had to be the same mop-head from last night, because a shimmery and swirly (and most definitely wonky) portal floated above it.  And through the portal, a large number of tomatoes and onions and cucumbers were coming through.

            “Huh.  Would you look at that,” Caleb said.  Then he ran back inside.

            Gloria and Sheila were still at Courtney’s side, but Phil was backing away as the woman swatted him over the head repeatedly with her purse.  “It is your job!  Give me my motherfucking lottery tickets!”

            “Sweet Jesus, lady, what do you got in your purse, a brick?” Phil asked.

            “Just part of one.  Now get your lazy ass behind the counter!”

            “She’s seems to be coming out of it a little, but her skin…” Gloria started, but then looked up at Caleb.  “What is it?”

            “Take a look out the door,” Caleb said.  Gloria looked out the glass door, and her eyes went wide.

            “Huh.  Would you look at that.”

            “Phil,” Caleb said.  “Quit screwing around with that lady and go get any weapons you brought with you tonight.  Hope you got a salad fork or something in that stuff.”

            “Don’t you ignore me!” the lady screamed.  “This is my lucky night, I know it!  My horoscope told me it would be!”

            Gloria stood up and smacked the lady across the face, stunning her long enough to let Phil escape.  “Cut it out already,” Gloria said.  “We’ll get you your damned lottery tickets if we get out of this alive, but right now we’ve got to stop a platoon of vegetables from turning the world into their plant-like slaves.”

            “You know,” Caleb said, “I think it’s totally hot that you just said that with a straight face.”

            Phil, still keeping a watchful eye on the woman as she stared longingly at the lottery ticket machine, went behind the counter and stooped down where he kept his duffel bag full of monster-fighting weapons.  Caleb went back to the door and locked it.

            “Do you really think that’s going to do much good?” Gloria asked.  Courtney had stopped shaking, and she was moaning as Sheila tried to help her up.  “The door’s only made of glass.  Not exactly hard to get through it.”

            “They’re vegetables,” Caleb said.  “What…”  He stopped himself.

            “What?” Gloria asked.  “What were you about to say?”

            “I was going to ask what a bunch of vegetable could possibly do to get through the glass, but if I said that they would just show me exactly what…”

            A tomato smashed against the door as though someone had thrown it.  As the seeds and juice slid down the glass, Caleb could hear a distinct hissing noise. 

            “Acid,” Gloria said.  “Looks like some of them have made extra genetic modifications to themselves.”

            Another tomato smashed against the glass.  Not only was the acid eating through it, but tomato guts and damaged glass was beginning to obscure their view of the vegetables coming through the portal.

            “Would somebody please do something?” Sheila asked.  Her voice had become shrill, and when she looked down at Courtney and saw her skin turning green she gently lowered the woman back to the ground before scooting away.

            “That mop-head,” Gloria said.  “We’ve got to do something to destroy it or take away its magic, and fast.  We can’t let any more veggies through, and we can’t let them get to any of our vegetables.”

            “Right,” Caleb said.  “Then they might be able to get them to turn on us and turn our world the same as theirs.  Phil, you got anything in your bag that would be useful against a mop-head?”

            “No, I left all my anti-mop-head weapons at home tonight,” Phil said.  “I do have a salad fork, though.”

            Caleb tried to look out the door, but it was incredibly difficult to see.  Just a few more tomatoes and the army of veggies would be able to get through.  “I don’t know if one salad fork is really going to do us much good anymore,” Caleb said.  “Their army’s getting too big.  Every moment we stay holed up in here, our chances of getting through this get smaller.”

            “Here,” Gloria said, pulling a lighter from her pocket.  “If we can get to the mop-head we can destroy it with fire.”

            “But we’ve got to get there, first,” Caleb said.  He walked up and down the aisles as he spoke, glancing at everything on the shelves.  “There’s got to be something here we can use.  We’re in a damned convenience store.  We have a little of everything.  So there’s got…”  He stopped at one of the shelves, then turned back to everyone and smiled.  “Ooh, I think I’ve got it.  Everyone, run in back and empty out all the spray bottles.”

            Moving as quickly as they could, it took them just over a minute to prepare for Caleb’s idea.  They had to leave Courtney on the floor at the moment, but she didn’t look like she was going anywhere soon.  Her eyes fluttered open every so often, but otherwise she still appeared out of it.  If the things she had been talking about were true, then it was possible her mind was gone by now.  He felt for her, having gone through all that in her own reality only to finally succumb to it right when she had a new chance at life. 

            Caleb grabbed the bottles he had found on the shelves and joined everyone else in the back room, helping them refill the spray bottles.  Even the lottery lady was helpful, now that she knew the only way she would get her tickets was if everyone survived long enough to work the machine for her.  When they came out of the back room, however, Courtney was gone.

            “Shit,” Caleb said.  “She go outside?”

            Gloria ran to the door and gave it a small push.  “Unlocked.”

            “Guess she’s one of them now,” Caleb said.  “Can’t help it.”  He turned to Sheila.  “Sorry.  There goes your new roommate.”

            Sheila shrugged.  “I told you.  I didn’t want to share my apartment with something freakish anyway.”  Despite her words, she failed completely at hiding the note of sadness in her voice.

            They did a quick check of the store to make sure no vegetables had gotten in- it wouldn’t be very good if they managed to defeat the army outside only to find that one lone soldier had survived to start the whole thing over again- before they all filed out the door.  Caleb hissed in his breath as he saw the parking lot.  The entire lot was full of vegetables of all kinds.  They weren’t going anywhere, but they all sort of swayed in an invisible breeze.  In the center of it all, the eggplant still sat next to the mop-head.  The portal was still open, but the vegetables came through it with less frequency now.  Either they were running out of reinforcements from the other side, or the mop-head’s magic was dissipating.  That didn’t really matter either way.  If they really could convert vegetables from this reality, then their army could still grow far beyond this.

            Courtney stood next to the eggplant.  Her eyelids continued to flutter and once in a while she would twitch.  Her skin had gone completely green now, and there were a few noticeable leaves sticking out of her pants.  She didn’t acknowledge Caleb or the others as they came out of the store.  She just stared down with a sort of rapture at the egg-plant and the mop-head.

            Caleb made sure all four of them had spray-bottles in hand, then cleared his throat before speaking down at the nearest kohlrabi.   “Um, take me to your leader?”

            The veggies all moved at once, clearing a path toward the eggplant.  As Caleb and the others walked slowly down the path, the vegetables closed the gap behind them.  There would be no way back into the store without stepping on a few, but Caleb had seen enough to not want that.  Just stepping on a tomato might melt his shoes.  There was no telling what the others might be able to do. 

            The group passed by the body of the jerky stealer, giving them a clear view of the holes in his back.  The sharpened celery was gone, but in their places several small plants were already growing. 

            “Damn, these veggies work fast,” Caleb said.

            “Technically, they’re not all vegetables,” Gloria said.  “Like the tomatoes?  Those are fruits.  They’ve got seeds in them.”

            “Scientifically, sure they’re fruits,” Caleb said.  “But nutritionally they’re solidly in the vegetable column.”

            “To hell with ‘nutritionally.’  They’re fruits.”

            “Veggies.”

            “Fruits!”

            “Veggies, damn it!”

            “All right, you know what?” Phil asked.  “For once I would just like to get through an impending apocalypse without you two getting sidetracked in some inane fucking argument.  That sound good to you?”

            “Are they always like that?” the lottery woman asked.

            “No,” Caleb and Gloria said.

            “Yes,” Phil said at the same time.

            Caleb stopped several feet from the eggplant.  “Um, so I guess that must make you the leader?” he asked.  The eggplant didn’t do anything to acknowledge that Caleb had even spoken.

            “Um, why isn’t he saying anything?” the lottery lady asked.

            “Because it’s an eggplant, you moron,” Caleb said.

            “Caleb,” Phil said, “you know you’re not supposed to talk to customers like that.”

            “Then I’ll talk to your customers like that for you,” Gloria said, then turned to the lottery lady.  “Because it’s an eggplant, you moron.”

            “Well, if it’s just an eggplant then how the hell is it holding up that mop-head?” the woman asked.  “And how exactly does a tomato fling itself at a door with nothing to throw it?”

            “Hey, do I come around to your place of business and point out all the plot-holes in the things you do?” Caleb asked.

            “No, but…”

            “Then don’t do it to us, okay?  We’ve got this covered.”

            Caleb turned slowly around, taking in all the vegetables.  None of them had taken notice of the spray bottles in their hands, but then he wasn’t how to tell if a veggie had taken notice of something in the first place.  Most of them just sat there, although at the far end of the veggie crowd he could see one of them moving for their group.  It looked like it might have been a scallion, and in its long green leaves it carried a plastic baggie.  He couldn’t quite see what was inside, but guessing from the sharp inhale Gloria made, he didn’t think she had the same problem.

            “What is it?” he asked.

            “Seeds,” Gloria said.

            “Seeds?  What’s so bad about that?” Phil asked.

            “It’s something Courtney said.  She said she thought they turned people into plants using either spores…”

            “Or seeds,” Caleb said.  “Okay.  Right then.  How about we not find out which of our orifices they plan on putting those in?”  He held out the spray bottle, not waiting to see if everyone else followed suit, and sprayed it over the nearest group of vegetables. 

            He had never heard veggies scream before, and probably never would again after that night, but that was exactly what they all did as Caleb covered them in salad dressing.

            Immediately all the vegetables he’d covered backed away.  The dressing didn’t do any damage to them, but some deep-seated ancestral fear caused them to run for their lives.  More veggies screamed from all around as the others followed his lead.  In only seconds they’d cleared a space of fifteen feet all around them.  Even the eggplant had backed away, trying to pull the mop-head with it.  Courtney continued to stand in place.  Just because she was a plant now apparently didn’t mean she had the same fears.  She continued to stare at the eggplant, though, and her twitches appeared to get worse.

            “Gloria, you’ve got the lighter,” Caleb said.  “Go for the mop-head!”

            “On it!” she yelled, running at the eggplant with the spray bottle in front of her, misting zesty Italian dressing the whole way. 

            “No, wait!” Phil called out.  “Gloria, stop!”  She seemed to notice the problem at the same time he did, but she was moving too fast to stop in time.  Five tomatoes had rolled out from the invading army and stopped directly in front of her.  Caleb watched in horror, expecting her to step on them and spray acid all over her legs, but apparently these had been modified in a different way.  Instead of bursting open beneath her feet, the tomatoes stayed firm and rolled as she stepped, causing her shoes to slip out from beneath her. 

            She hit the ground back-first, making an “oof” noise as the wind got knocked out of her.  Caleb tried to run to help her up, but one of the tomatoes launched itself into the air and clobbered him in the side of the head.  He heard both Phil and the lottery lady yelling for help, probably as they were hit, too, but the blow had been hard enough to knock him out for just a second.  He collapsed to his knees, and another tomato flew through the air to knock the spray bottle out of his hand.  The other vegetables were on him moments later, covering him and holding him down.

            “Shit,” he heard Gloria say from somewhere nearby, but Caleb couldn’t see through all the vegetables blocking his vision.  “Anybody else got any bright ideas?”

            “Guuuhgh,” someone said nearby.  Caleb wasn’t sure who it was, but he guessed it was the lottery lady.  Maybe her mouth was too covered in leafy greens to speak, or maybe she was trying to speak out as the scallion implanted the seeds in her or…

            “Guuughno.  No.  No!”

            Or maybe that wasn’t the lottery lady at all.  Caleb lifted his head, and even though a head of lettuce was trying to pull it back down, he could see Courtney at the edge of his vision.  She wasn’t just standing in place anymore.  Every movement she made seemed to take a terrible effort, but she was going toward the eggplant.

            “Courtney!” Gloria called out.  “Hey, Caleb, she’s fighting it!”

            Maybe Courtney’s rebellion against their control had distracted the vegetables, because Caleb could now move a little under them as their weight shifted.  He threw several of them off him and sat up to see the show.  Gloria, Phil, and the lottery lady all got up, too, and immediately the all scrambled to each others’ sides.  The eggplant shook as Courtney moved closer, as did most of the other vegetables.  Every single time any one of the army of veggies moved, it looked like it caused Courtney pain, but she continued moving toward the eggplant.

            “Get… out of my head!” she screamed.  “I will not let… you do to this world… what you did to mine!”  She lunged forward, ignoring the other vegetables that threw themselves at her.  One of the tomatoes splattered open on her shirt and immediately began to sizzle against her skin, but she didn’t look like she felt it.  She fell at the eggplant, grabbing it in one hand and the mop-head in the other, causing the inter-dimensional portal to vanish.

            Courtney gave a wordless, agonized scream, then shoved the eggplant in her mouth and took a bite.  The eggplant screamed as she spit the piece in her mouth out and then chomped into it again.  After three bites, the eggplant stopped moving.

            For several seconds, the entire parking lot went quiet.  Then the vegetables started to, for lack of a better word, mumble.  They didn’t sound happy.

            “Courtney, are you…” Gloria started to ask, but Courtney cut her off.

            “I think I remember how to do this,” Courtney said.  “Anyone who doesn’t want to go to a planet ruled by those damn dirty vegetables, you better get by my side real fast.”  She held up the mop-head in front of her and began to mumble a bunch of strange words. 

            She didn’t need to tell any of them a second time.  Most of the vegetables were still stunned by what Courtney had done to their leader, although a few began to stir as Caleb, Gloria, Phil, and the lottery lady kicked the vegetables aside to get next to Courtney.  Courtney backed through the vegetables until they all had their backs against the outer wall of the OneStop, and when Caleb looked out over the army he saw several celery stalks and tomatoes rise into the air by some unknown force, looking like they were about to shoot straight at the humans.

            “Courtney, whatever you’re about to do,” Caleb said, “I would suggest doing…”

            Courtney held up the mop-head in front of her like she was holding the severed head of a Medusa by the hair, screaming out the final words of her spell.  “Klaatu barada nikto!”

            The air in front of the mop-head shimmered and swirled and even wonked a little.  The portal reappeared just as several vegetables flew at them.  Instead of impaling or burning the humans, the vegetables disappeared.

            “Barada!” Courtney yelled, and the portal became bigger.  A wind picked up and various bits of garbage that had been sitting in the parking lot flew around, much of it getting sucked up in the portal’s vortex.  Several of the nearest vegetables were also picked up in the wind, and they vanished into the portal with little veggie screams.  At the outer edges of the parking lot many of the vegetables tried to get away, but the wind pulled them back.

            “Barada!” she yelled again, and the wind grew to near-tornado levels.  Caleb could feel it trying to drag him into the portal even from the opposite side, and all the humans grabbed onto Courtney for support.  Hundreds of vegetables were hurled through the air, all going back where they had come from.

            The last vegetable that got sucked back through was a single cherry tomato.  It was tough to hear through the roar of the wind, but Caleb thought her heard it say one last word in a single high-pitched squeak.  The word sounded suspiciously like “Rosebud.”

            “Nikto,” Courtney said.  The portal vanished, and the poor girl collapsed.

*          *          *

            “There,” the lottery lady said as Phil finally handed her tonight’s lottery tickets.  “Now was that really so hard?”

            Caleb could see that Phil was trying very hard not to say something rude.  Instead the clerk simply said, “Thank you, come again,” and the woman finally left.

            Gloria phoned the police about the jerky-stealer’s body in the parking lot while Caleb and Sheila helped Courtney back inside.  The girl looked extremely weak, but at least she wasn’t showing any more signs of her earlier seizures.  They brought her into the back room and rested her on a metal folding chair.  She didn’t look like she could hold herself up in it, so Caleb stayed next to her just in case.  Sheila, however, kept her distance.

            “Courtney?  Can you understand me?” Caleb asked.

            “More or less,” she said groggily. 

            “Guess this makes you one of the rare people who can fight away the veggies’ control,” he said.

            “And if we got all of them,” Courtney said, “then it shouldn’t matter anyway.  With none of them around trying to use me like a puppet, I think I can still be my normal self.”

            “Except you’re still green,” Caleb said.  “And you have leaves sticking up out of your… um… area.”

            “Then I guess I’ll just need a whole lot of makeup.  And maybe a set of hedge trimmers.”

            Gloria came into the back room.  “Phil’s staying up front to take care of the customers starting to come back in,” she said.  “Caleb, he’ll probably need your help soon.”

            “Thank you, guys,” Courtney said.  “I’m in your debt, all of you.”  She looked over at Sheila.  “But, um, I suppose you’re probably not going to want me as a roommate, huh?”

           “You’re a giant walking plant,” Sheila said.  “Of course I don’t.  But here on the Hill, you’re probably the best option I’m going to find.  You just better not be dropping leaves all over my new carpet, got it?”  She took off her OneStop smock and tossed it on a hook in the room’s corner.  “I guess I’ll see you soon enough.”

            They all remained silent until Sheila had left the room.  “My, she’s going to be an interesting roommate,” Courtney said.

            “I’m sure you’ll get used to her,” Caleb said.

            “Now I just need to find a job, I guess.”

            “You could always apply here,” Gloria said.  “The Apocalypse Shift is still short a person.”

            “Really?” she asked.  “I don’t know.  After fighting a rebellion against vegetables in a parallel world, I’m not sure working at a convenience store would be something I could go back to.”

            “I’m sure this particular store is a little more interesting than most,” Caleb said.  “But only a little.”

            “Hey, you better punch in,” Gloria said.  “Big Maggie’s already going to be pissed when she looks at the time clock and sees you were this late.”

            “Aw crap,” Caleb said.  “You mean to tell me I did all that without getting paid for any of it?” 

            “Don’t complain so much,” Gloria said.  “It could be…”

            “Don’t.  You.  Dare.  Say it,” Caleb said.  Maybe he had stopped her in time.  Hopefully he had.  Because if anyone here even so much as thought that things could be worse…

            There was a scream from the back of the store, and Caleb couldn’t help but give Courtney a weary smile.  “Welcome to the Apocalypse Shift.” 

The End

(c) 2009 Derek J. Goodman

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1 Response to “The Leek Shall Inherit the Earth – Part 2”


  1. 1 Jax
    December 21, 2009 at 3:24 am

    Salad dressing?! Rosebud?! ACK!! XDDDDD


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